This happened to me so long ago, I had almost forgotten about it. More like a suppressed memory, actually. I've never told anyone this story before, but after seeing a recent post about a "oh shit, woops!" moment when talking shit about someone who was actually still in the raid group, it all came flooding back.
We were working on Heroic Spine of Deathwing progression. Going for a server first kill. Our Main Tank wasn't able to be there for raid night, so we decided to try to find a geared tank to come along and help us out. The tanks duty on that fight (for those of you who didn't play back then) was one of the most important in that tier. It involved very precise kiting, positioning of adds, soaking, etc. It was a big deal.
We searched /2 for a while looking for anyone interested, and just couldn't seem to find anyone promising. I remembered that I had a guy on my friends list who had a geared Druid tank character. We had met in random dungeons and hit it off. Super nice guy. Very timid and shy, but seemed like a decent player. He was cool. I figured he would be up to the challenge.
I whisper him, he accepts. We summon him in, explain the fight, and begin progression.
…… …….And it's bad.
The Druid tank just isn't getting it. Something about the fight, he just can't grasp. He's soaking puddles with the wrong add, he's kiting away from the armor when an explosion goes off, he's falling off every time Deathwing rolls, he's missing taunts and letting players get melee'd by adds. It's just all bad. It's all falling apart.
We hang in there, assuming that he's just trying to get the hang of it. We continue to pull and wipe for 3 hours. It never gets any better.
Frustrated and embarrassed (I mean, this was the guy that I had vouched for. The friend of mine that I convinced the raid to bring in, telling them how good he was), I decided to throw up the white flag and admit defeat.
I whisper the GM/Raid Leader something to the effect of: "Hey, I'm sorry. Obviously this guy isn't nearly as good as I thought he was. I really don't even know him. Just some random I added after running dungeons. I think it's clear now that he isn't capable of tanking difficult content. We'll never kill this boss with him tanking. Just kick him and we'll find someone that can do it."
……. …….. ……… ……….
I receive a whisper from the Druid tank. It just says, ":("
……. ……… ……… ………
I had whispered all of that to him, and not the Raid Leader like I intended……
My balls shriveled. My butthole pucked. I felt like the biggest asshole in the world in that moment.
I tried to apologize to him. I told him that I wasn't meaning to be harsh. That it had just been a long night and I was frustrated.
He never replied to me. He just left the raid, removed me from friends list, and logged out.
I know I'm a terrible person. I've had to live with this monkey on my back for the last several years, ever since.
Please tell me that someone else out there has done something similar. I can't be the only one….