I wake up in the morning to my Amon Amarth playlist. It's 7:30 AM, just in time. I am ready to go on a raid at the playground. I leave home with my sword and shield in my backpack. No one knows yet how powerful of a Warlord I am, but they'll learn today. I remember to put my Mjölnir necklace on before I head to school. Valhalla awaits.
I get there and the hottest girl at school, Valkyrie, is being bullied by Warden and Kensei, those no honor 2v1 pricks. I pull out my sword and shield, it's time to wreck some noobs. I charge in and knock the Warden over the seesaw with my shield. He then screams some "DEUS VULT AVE MARIA NON NOBUS DOMINE" shit at me, which is probably his stupid people's way of flaming me for environmental killing, but I don't care, I'm a Warlord main. Kensei then looks at me, swinging his sword around wildly attempting to confuse me of his direction of attack. Then he screams something in Japanese, but I don't speak Japanese, but through my fluent understanding of Japanese I can only assume he said "BURNING SUNLIGHT YELLOW FACESLAMMING OVERHAND SLASH OF DOOMSTRUCTION" as he attempts to use his unblockable bullshit on me. Little does he know I stayed up all night practicing parrys for this exact situation. I then headbutt his stupid weeb face and stab him repeatedly. I have emerged victorious, and saved the grill.
We walk into class and my asshole teacher Shugoki gives me stupid homework. God, I'm too good for homework, I'm much too busy improving my Warlord gameplay to stay as the best. He then yells at me for not having any homework this semester finished, so I headbutt him into the chalk board and flee the building as my asshole teacher calls me a guard break spammer. I then go home to my dad Raider and brother Berserker, I tell them they're bad and go get some Dr. Pepper and Pizza Rolls. I then tell myself "time to guard break some fags." For Asgard.
P.S. We fucked.